Swords

W and myself visit a local nursery with a view to a place for next year. We're getting in very early as most of the staff seem to think the child has already made an appearance. It's a very nice place and mid way through the visit Jan, the nursery supervisor, starts telling us about the play room we've just entered.

Jan: In this room they can learn different types of skill and fulfil several different criteria: communication, language and literacy; knowledge and understanding of the world; and personal and emotional development.
Me: It's where they play?
Jan: Yes, they learn play here.
W: 'Learn play'?
Me: Can't they just, you know, play?
Jan: Within certain boundaries and, of course, their own development.

She decides not to explain further.

Jan: And the table over there with the numbers, develops problem solving, reasoning and numeracy skills.
W: They learn to count?
Jan: We provide the resources that support one-to-one correspondences, for example, giving each teddy two cups.
Me: Very handy skill. Child! Make mine without sugar.

Everyone stares at me in my early attempt to develop 'Dad humour'.

Jan: There's also a messy play area.

We stare at a young girl gleefully spreading shaving foam across the surface of a table with the help of a nursery assistant. I start to think that growing a beard, at least until the kid is 18, might be a good idea.

Jan: Lots of the kids, bless them, make the areas their own. One little boy wanted a Roman amphitheatre - think he must have been watching Gladiator or something - so we helped make one out of an old box from the supermarket.
Me: Sounds nice.
Jan: It was. He even advised on the decoration. Then, of course, he wanted a sword.

Jan notes our shared glance of 'and you didn't see that one coming?'

Jan: Cardboard only of course. Mind you, we still had to do a risk assessment. It's important they know what they can do with it.
W: We wouldn't want a massacre.
Jan: No! (laughs) So whenever he gets it out we say 'have you done your risk assessment ? You know how to hold it?' And he says 'Yes, I've done the risk assessment'.
Me: Articulate kid.
Jan: It's important that everyone shares the rationale of consistent boundaries and maintains reasonable limits.

That's me told me then.  

We're on the waiting list.